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How to Make Friends

Stub • 331 Words • Friendship • 08/07/2024

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Meeting People (Finding Friends)

  • mutual friends!!
    • ask your friends if you think you would get along with any of their friends or if any of their friends are looking for other friends
      • having an introduction from a friend or a third wheel during a first hangout is extremely beneficial
    • try to mix friend groups
      • friends of friends are more likely to be compatible with each other
      • cultivate a culture of introducing friends to each other
        • you may have to be straightforward at first and ask someone if they have friends that they think that you’d vibe with
      • injecting new people into a group let’s everyone get to know each other more even people you already “know” because it gives you more license to ask basic intro questions or spur conversions with new activations
  • enter spaces for people who share hobbies/interests with you
    • community meetups
    • work business resource groups
    • volunteering
  • invite people to things
    • inviting people to things gives you small insights into their lives when they are busy and say they can’t make an event
      • it also increases the chance of you getting invited to something else
    • if there aren’t spaces to meet people or mix people, then you may have to create it yourself

Converting from a First Impression (Making Friends)

If you find someone interesting, find a low stakes way of getting in touch with them

  • if you asking for their number is too scary, you can ask for Instagram or some other form of social media
  • if inviting them to your house intimidates you, invite them out somewhere
    • get a drink (bar or cafe) somewhere that is conducive toward conversation
    • if you have other friends doing something already, ask if you can bring this new person along (if you think they’ll be able to connect)
  • strike while the iron is hot and try to plan something if you’re actually serious about connecting with this person
    • “we should definitely hang out!” <– two people that will never hang out

Other Friendship Posts

On Friend Groups

Are large friend groups beneficial? Are they tenable long-term?

Reach Out First

The benefits of reaching out to people first and how to effectively reach out.

In Defense of Medium Friends

A medium friend is someone who is beyond an acquaintance but not a close friend. I argue that these are a deeply important type of relationship.


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